- 12-05-2012, 04:21 PM #1
I'm 15 years old, and I'm in 9th grade. I hate being bullied. The last time I had a REAL friend was when I was in 7th grade, where the last friend I ever had moved to Hungary. I am being teased "Kaaaelle (south park)", "go **** yourself", "you have no friends". I am also treated like ****. I can't tell a teacher because that is "tattling". Any ideas? Have you guys been bullied before?
And I did nothing them. I'm a geek, so that's probably why.
- 12-05-2012, 04:26 PM #2
12-05-2012, 04:43 PM #3
- 499 Posts
They're talking to you as if they are 4th grade cartoon characters. You may be a geek, but they have to resort to using material from a cartoon because their brains are mostly full of air.
Don't get upset. Smile and try to make conversation with others or the followers who witness this going on. In the end you will be more liked and admired for not stepping to their level.
- 12-05-2012, 04:43 PM #4
I think you should talk to an adult about it. What's the worst that could happen? They'll tease and bully you about it? They're doing that anyways. They may not like you "tattling", but if enough adults know, then at least they'll be forced to stop. Yeah, they might talk crap about you behind your back... but who cares about that really? Their opinions don't matter. The goal is to just get them to leave you alone.
Also, bullies hate confidence. If you carry yourself with confidence, and don't appear bothered by anything they say or do, then they'll tire of bullying you.
One thing that you can't do is fear bullies. Bullies pick on you because they think that you're an easy target and you'll get bothered. It makes them feel stronger. I was always very confrontational with anyone that tried to bully me when I was little. Didn't show fear. Also, wasn't afraid to mention how immature they were being while at the same time not showing that anything they said bothered me. And if they wanted to fight because of it I didn't back down. I relished the opportunity. And 99% of the time they'd back down because they were just full of hot air looking for an easy target.
But as I said earlier... there's no harm in telling an adult if they're going to be picking on you anyways, right?
- 12-05-2012, 04:46 PM #6
Sorry to hear that you're going through that. I too got picked on around the same age in high school. I had pretty bad spots, braces and I am asian so I guess I was a pretty easy target then. You definitely need to tell someone. I let it get to me (missed out on school, somewhat depressed) and in the end I was the one who got in trouble (my parents got called in). It's hard to give advice here, but all I can say is you're not alone. There are people who can relate to what's happening to you and there are people who will listen and help you. In my case, since I went to a catholic school, a priest talked to me and I was able to confide in him. It helped to just get everything out and I can honestly say I was able to move on.
I hope you everything works out for you
12-05-2012, 04:52 PM #7
- 106 Posts
To topic creator:
Don't let them push you around. Stand up to them. That'll earn you respect. In the end, you'll be better off than they are. Don't let things get violent though. But learn some self defense just in case. As said before talk to an adult too.
You'll see how different things will be when you're older. The pricks could be bagging your groceries or mowing your lawn one day. University is a completely different atmosphere. So don't let these tossers ruin your life. Trust me, this comes from experience.
- 12-05-2012, 05:16 PM #9
Anyway, what you want to do is not let it get to you. If they don't get a reaction then they won't get a kick out of it and they should stop doing it. Also, try and join a sport or a club or something where you can find other like-minded people so you can have more friends. Be yourself, but try to be a likeable person and don't be annoying.
12-05-2012, 05:56 PM #10
- 106 Posts
- 12-05-2012, 06:13 PM #11
- 12-05-2012, 07:21 PM #13
If there's something physical involved, like they're hitting you, call the police and file an assault charge. Don't back down from filing an assault charge.
- 12-05-2012, 07:28 PM #14
If you're on Twitter, feel free to PM me your Twitter handle. I'd like to get you in touch with my cousin. She wouldn't necessarily be able to do anything, but she can connect you with a network of people that understand the crap you're dealing with.
- 12-05-2012, 07:33 PM #15
I've had them threaten me. I've had groups hold my arms and legs while someone twice my size stand in front of me and threaten to beat me to a bloody pulp.
I always was calm and unafraid. I would say things like, "And after you beat me up, what will that do? Is it an accomplishment. I haven't done anything to you, and you want to do this. What do you hope to achieve?"
And yes... that is how I said it. lol
Normally they'd be a little confused because I didn't sound scared, but I also didn't sound angry. I sounded like a psychologist. hahaha
Pretty much left me alone every time. I even ended up making friends with a lot of bullies and they sort of changed their ways and stopped picking on people.
12-05-2012, 07:33 PM #16
- 35 Posts
The only advice I can give is that none of this matters once you're out of high school. I'm sure that's not much comfort to you now, but these people will not be in your life much longer. Do your best to appreciate who you are because once u are out of high school, its up to you to decide who you become. I wish you the best of luck. With the internet, there is always another geek like you around that will be your friend. That's the beauty of it. Be well my friend 😊
- 12-05-2012, 08:01 PM #17
Winning Guy; I must say it is great to see there are persons out there willing to help like yourself and others in this forums. Well done!
and Unstoppablekem keep your head hi and good luck....
12-05-2012, 08:07 PM #18
- 19 Posts
Hi unstoppablekem. Talk to an authority figure, a counselor or security guard. Don't be afraid of other kids thinking of you as tattling, that is a minor thought you should be worried about. What is important is that you feel comfortable going to school and shouldn't have to worry about being pushed. TALK TO AN AUTHORITY FIGURE.
- 12-05-2012, 10:10 PM #20
For now though, just be sure to tell an adult, school counselor, etc and make sure they get involved. This whole society is going to **** in a handbasket with so much emphasis put on vanity and looking good, that we forget as people, we are to love one another and treat everyone with the respect they deserve despite the fact that someone may act or look differently than they do.
I'll be completely honest with you, it may seem like a big deal to you since it's the only frame of reference you have but once you get into college and look back, you'll quickly realize that all the petty crap that goes on in high school is pretty meaningless. Also, once you hit 15-16 years old, you start focusing on girls, driving, etc. so the bullying and acting childish kind of just goes away on its own. If it still persists, carry your head high, act confident and don't let it bother as best as you can. I know being ridiculed and that words hurt, but do your best to try and not let it phase you. Also, find a local club or church youth group to get involved with. When I was in high school, my youth group was constantly doing activities and having parties on the weekend and some of the best times I ever had in high school, were at those functions. The friends I made in youth group are lifelong friends to this day as well.
- 12-05-2012, 10:14 PM #21
OP, stick out the bullying for a couple of more years (and don't be afraid to stand up for yourself). You'll rise above them all.
Years later, they'll be losers and you'll have a life better than anything you could have imagined at age 15. Trust me on this. They bully you because you're different -- you're not mediocre -- and mediocre people generally hate people who excel at something.
The best way to defeat them is to enjoy life and keep moving on towards success, while they stew in their mediocrity.
- 12-05-2012, 10:21 PM #22
Amen to that, some years from now your life will way be better than these kids'.
A lot of folks might not agree with me, but I got bullied in middle school too (chubby Asian, not a good combo) and the philosophy I tended to follow was an eye for an eye. If these kids pick on you and it gets physical, get ready to hit them harder. Yes, you'll get in trouble but it shows them that you're not some pushover.
- 12-06-2012, 07:11 AM #23
Bullying is nothing to mess around with. People commit suicide every year because of it. Skip talking to the teacher and go straight to the principal. Get the parents involved. Do not sit there and suffer in silence.
As for not having friends, just be yourself. Always be yourself and do it with confidence. Friends will find you.
And so will the ladies. AM I RIGHT, GUYS!
- 12-06-2012, 10:06 AM #25
This is all really good feedback. People here are right, they are doing this because they think it bothers you and you are weak. If you show them it doesn't bother you and that you are not weak by ignoring it or laughing it off, the reason for their bullying will disappear. As said before, you are probably being bullied because you are a "geek" (aka smarter than them), and they don't like anyone who doesn't fit their average, middle-of-the-road personality and intelligence. Take solace in the fact you will likely be their boss one day!