Both GPUs are always on when they are connected, and both will be used, depending on open apps.
You can open Task Manager to see what GPU each app is using. Right-click taskbar, right-click Start button, Win+X, Ctrl+Alt+Del, or just Ctrl+Shift+Esc.
Open the full Task Manager by clicking More Details, if needed.
Under the Processes tab, there should be a GPU Engine column. Apps that are using a GPU will list the number of the one they are using. You can figure out which GPU it is by looking under the Performance tab.
You can also add an app to your taskbar that tells you when the Nvidia GPU is in use. Right-click desktop > Nvidia Control Panel > Desktop menu > Display GPU activity icon in notification area. This will add a small icon to the taskbar notification area. It will be grey if the Nvidia GPU is not in use, or lit up if it is. You can click it to see what apps are using it.
If you want to choose which GPU an app uses, go back into Nvidia Control Panel, and go to the Manage 3D settings page. Go to the Program Settings tab. Choose an app (or add, if it's not listed), and then choose which GPU you want to use for it.