1. Laura Knotek's Avatar
    Why is it easier to think of what we don't have versus what we do have?

    It's been mentioned to me in a session that I should think of the positive thing first instead of seeing the negative thing and then thinking of the positive thing. Easier said than done when it comes to myself.
    That's something known as cognitive distortion. There are exercises to help with that.
    07-22-2019 10:10 PM
  2. libra89's Avatar
    So I was minding my business, trying to get home in a thunderstorm that would make Mr. Clue blush...when the trains acted the F up again with signal issues.

    Had get home in a part of this. At least I tested the cameras out (LG cam, G cam port). Attachment 141080Attachment 141081
    Wow, the rain looks crazy. I feel for you having to walk into it.

    Also it's interesting how the light appears for each light source (streetlights, taillights, etc) in one photo versus the other.
    Laura Knotek likes this.
    07-22-2019 10:12 PM
  3. libra89's Avatar
    That's something known as cognitive distortion. There are exercises to help with that.
    Interesting, thank you for sharing that with me. I'll have to look into it and possibly ask about it.
    Laura Knotek and N_LaRUE like this.
    07-22-2019 10:13 PM
  4. Laura Knotek's Avatar
    Interesting, thank you for sharing that with me. I'll have to look into it and possibly ask about it.
    It's very common, and it's something that I'm working on myself.
    MSFTisMIA, libra89 and N_LaRUE like this.
    07-22-2019 10:40 PM
  5. MSFTisMIA's Avatar
    Wow, the rain looks crazy. I feel for you having to walk into it.

    Also it's interesting how the light appears for each light source (streetlights, taillights, etc) in one photo versus the other.
    I had a mini umbrella which got me wet but kept me from being absolutely drenched. It held up well all things considered. The surprise was the ear hooks for the wireless headphones. Had to jump over some deep water pools at some curbs and the earbuds didn't fall out.

    The camera apps did just fine.
    07-22-2019 10:44 PM
  6. MSFTisMIA's Avatar
    The gf got stuck in part of the transit mess too. She talked about crowded platforms and it being a pain to transfer on super hot subway platforms with the thunderstorm raging outside. I rather walk in a flash flooding level thunderstorm than deal with that, so I did.

    I didn't think it was worth paying cab to get home (yes, I was being cheap). The crazy part is that this is the third sort of big issue like this for the MTA within the past two months, with it being the second in two weeks.

    **** breaks down but for the MTA, this ain't a good look.
    N_LaRUE, Laura Knotek and libra89 like this.
    07-22-2019 10:50 PM
  7. N_LaRUE's Avatar
    Why is it easier to think of what we don't have versus what we do have?

    It's been mentioned to me in a session that I should think of the positive thing first instead of seeing the negative thing and then thinking of the positive thing. Easier said than done when it comes to myself.
    I think a lot of people suffer from this kind of thinking. I think typically women express it more but I'm pretty sure it's universal. Men just don't talk about it like they should.

    There's a branch of psychology called Positive Psychology. It's still relatively new but don't confuse it with 'being happy all the time' nonsense that some gurus push. Positive psychology is about increasing your baseline happiness not distorting your thinking to being happy all the time. It acknowledges the ups and downs of life and how to deal with them. My wife is an advocate of this and wants to get more involved with it. I've also found some of the things in it very helpful. I'm not the most positive person. (I know big surprise there)

    Three things that are pretty well known from this branch of psychology have become more mainstream. You may have heard of them.

    One is mindfulness - being in the moment and appreciating it

    Two is flow - which is when you become involved with something deeply (work or otherwise) and things just seem to 'flow'

    Three is gratitude journal writing - being grateful for what you have and acknowledging it in writing, typically daily. It can be one thing a day or several. It's up to you. It's just important to think about.

    All three of these things are very helpful but the last one is the one that I find the most difficult but useful. It sounds easy but until you try it you'll understand. Keep in mind being grateful about something can just be little things but acknowledging it gives it meaning. That's the important part.

    There's some good books on this subject and I'd be happy to point you to the right people if you want to know more but I'd suggest trying the gratitude journal writing to start.
    aximtreo, libra89 and Laura Knotek like this.
    07-23-2019 02:26 AM
  8. N_LaRUE's Avatar
    I had a mini umbrella which got me wet but kept me from being absolutely drenched. It held up well all things considered. The surprise was the ear hooks for the wireless headphones. Had to jump over some deep water pools at some curbs and the earbuds didn't fall out.

    The camera apps did just fine.
    That was some heavy rain. We could use some of that here.

    This week is going to be a scorcher. Then hopefully rain and cooler.
    Laura Knotek likes this.
    07-23-2019 02:38 AM
  9. N_LaRUE's Avatar
    Yay! The UK Trump is the new PM!

    Things are looking so rosy in the UK...

    Can't wait to see what fumbles through to get Brexit over the line by the Oct 31st...

    Tall order that.
    Laura Knotek likes this.
    07-23-2019 07:08 AM
  10. raycpl's Avatar
    Had two straight days off heavy downpour in the afternoon. Twice we were caught while hauling the durians from the hill slopes to the shelter.


    Most of the durian trees were planted almost two decades ago by the original owner.

    Yeah, there is a couple of young newly matured trees called 'Musang King'.. apparently amongst the most expensive variety out there. Unfortunately, it has only bore a few fruits, and its just enough for our own consumption. Hopefully it'll bear more next season...
    07-23-2019 07:11 AM
  11. MSFTisMIA's Avatar
    That was some heavy rain. We could use some of that here.

    This week is going to be a scorcher. Then hopefully rain and cooler.
    My perception of what counts as heavy rains are slightly skewed having been in what eventually ended up being one of the strongest hurricanes ever as a child.

    All considered, it was pretty strong, bursty rain.
    07-23-2019 08:52 AM
  12. MSFTisMIA's Avatar
    Yay! The UK Trump is the new PM!

    Things are looking so rosy in the UK...

    Can't wait to see what fumbles through to get Brexit over the line by the Oct 31st...

    Tall order that.
    This is gonna be an old school cluster**** indeed. Better pull out your finest tea set and scones recipe to get through watching this trainwreck.

    When the lifestyle of the privileged gets threatened, **** like this becomes too commonplace. 100% panic moves always leave the common man to pay for priviled mistakes.
    N_LaRUE, libra89 and Laura Knotek like this.
    07-23-2019 09:05 AM
  13. libra89's Avatar
    I think a lot of people suffer from this kind of thinking. I think typically women express it more but I'm pretty sure it's universal. Men just don't talk about it like they should.

    There's a branch of psychology called Positive Psychology. It's still relatively new but don't confuse it with 'being happy all the time' nonsense that some gurus push. Positive psychology is about increasing your baseline happiness not distorting your thinking to being happy all the time. It acknowledges the ups and downs of life and how to deal with them. My wife is an advocate of this and wants to get more involved with it. I've also found some of the things in it very helpful. I'm not the most positive person. (I know big surprise there)

    Three things that are pretty well known from this branch of psychology have become more mainstream. You may have heard of them.

    One is mindfulness - being in the moment and appreciating it

    Two is flow - which is when you become involved with something deeply (work or otherwise) and things just seem to 'flow'

    Three is gratitude journal writing - being grateful for what you have and acknowledging it in writing, typically daily. It can be one thing a day or several. It's up to you. It's just important to think about.

    All three of these things are very helpful but the last one is the one that I find the most difficult but useful. It sounds easy but until you try it you'll understand. Keep in mind being grateful about something can just be little things but acknowledging it gives it meaning. That's the important part.

    There's some good books on this subject and I'd be happy to point you to the right people if you want to know more but I'd suggest trying the gratitude journal writing to start.
    Hmm that's really interesting. I have heard of one and three but not so much the second one. I agree about the gratitude journal being difficult. At the beginning of the year, I did a 90 day challenge of doing that and at times, it was hard to find something to write about or I just didn't feel it.

    Maybe I should do it again. I'm in a period of waiting so it's tough.
    Laura Knotek likes this.
    07-23-2019 09:07 AM
  14. libra89's Avatar
    Yay! The UK Trump is the new PM!

    Things are looking so rosy in the UK...

    Can't wait to see what fumbles through to get Brexit over the line by the Oct 31st...

    Tall order that.
    Just heard about this. How sad. :(
    N_LaRUE and Laura Knotek like this.
    07-23-2019 09:12 AM
  15. N_LaRUE's Avatar
    Hmm that's really interesting. I have heard of one and three but not so much the second one. I agree about the gratitude journal being difficult. At the beginning of the year, I did a 90 day challenge of doing that and at times, it was hard to find something to write about or I just didn't feel it.

    Maybe I should do it again. I'm in a period of waiting so it's tough.
    The thing with gratitude journal writing is that it doesn't have to be a big process.

    Just a sentence. "Today I'm grateful for...."

    That's it. It's easy to get caught up in trying to make something a big process when all you need to do is look at the simple things and a quick sentence.

    As for Flow. There's a whole book on it. It's not as well known but I have heard people mention it on TV in the UK. I've also heard some YouTube people mention it but I'm typically skeptical on those people. They tend to promote 'trends'.

    Positive psychology isn't a trend type of thing. It's unfortunately being co-opted by the money making 'woo' ministers (typically those promoted by Oprah). You'll hear a lot of them use words from the theory and promote it as their own or say something like 'the science of positive psychology says..." So it's good to be careful who you hear things from. Positive psychology is a science and like all science it's constantly being looked at, challenged and new ideas are emerging.

    In life sometimes little things can mean a lot. I believe in keeping things simple.
    libra89 and Laura Knotek like this.
    07-23-2019 09:26 AM
  16. N_LaRUE's Avatar
    Just heard about this. How sad. :(
    It's sad but I'm ecstatically glad I'm not in the UK anymore.
    libra89 and Laura Knotek like this.
    07-23-2019 09:27 AM
  17. N_LaRUE's Avatar
    This is gonna be an old school cluster**** indeed. Better pull out your finest tea set and scones recipe to get through watching this trainwreck.

    When the lifestyle of the privileged gets threatened, **** like this becomes too commonplace. 100% panic moves always leave the common man to pay for priviled mistakes.
    I'm really curious how this is going to go. Like you said it's like watching a train wreck but for me (and many others) it's been a three year train wreck in the making. Now just three months they plan to sort it out... yeah I see that happening...

    The common person is going to get hurt the most out of this but they are the ones who let the wool over their eyes and drank the kool-aid.

    So many of the people against the EU are against them for the wrong reasons and sadly the mainstream media hasn't helped one bit. They've been so soft on the Brexit leaders it's pathetic.

    But then, how do you change a 'religious belief' in something? You can point out all the things that are wrongly reported and they still think the same way. Not much different than 45 supporters.

    If you ever read the nonsense coming out of some 'Brexit believers' it's crazy. They bring up WWI and WWII FFS!!! I mean really what does that have to do with anything???? Talk about living in the past....

    I'm at a loss really. Part of me feels sorry for people the other part just wants me to see an end to this nonsense.
    libra89 and Laura Knotek like this.
    07-23-2019 09:36 AM
  18. N_LaRUE's Avatar
    My perception of what counts as heavy rains are slightly skewed having been in what eventually ended up being one of the strongest hurricanes ever as a child.

    All considered, it was pretty strong, bursty rain.
    I haven't been in a hurricane (thankfully) but in a few tropical storms so I have a good handle on large quantities of rain.

    Rain after long periods of dry weather is never a good thing.
    aximtreo and Laura Knotek like this.
    07-23-2019 09:40 AM
  19. N_LaRUE's Avatar
    It's funny. A lot of the media in the UK are saying how short lived Boris will be as PM. They're talking a few of months.

    Not sure about that...

    It's a big 'depends on' thing. Truth is his party being the mess it is will be his downfall rather than the public likability.

    If Brexit doesn't happen (one way or the other) by Oct 31st the Tory party as it is will be decimated in any type of election which will likely come about because of that.

    It really is down to the next three months for Boris in that way. I guess most can't see him doing what needs to be done which is why they have that timeline.

    Interesting times...
    libra89 and Laura Knotek like this.
    07-23-2019 10:10 AM
  20. fatclue_98's Avatar
    My perception of what counts as heavy rains are slightly skewed having been in what eventually ended up being one of the strongest hurricanes ever as a child.

    All considered, it was pretty strong, bursty rain.
    Went through Andrew in my late 20s. I’m so done with hurricanes and thunderstorms. Funny thing is, I can deal with the storms since they last a few hours. It’s the weeks without power in this absurd heat that I can’t handle anymore.
    N_LaRUE, aximtreo and Laura Knotek like this.
    07-23-2019 12:04 PM
  21. libra89's Avatar
    The thing with gratitude journal writing is that it doesn't have to be a big process.

    Just a sentence. "Today I'm grateful for...."

    That's it. It's easy to get caught up in trying to make something a big process when all you need to do is look at the simple things and a quick sentence.

    As for Flow. There's a whole book on it. It's not as well known but I have heard people mention it on TV in the UK. I've also heard some YouTube people mention it but I'm typically skeptical on those people. They tend to promote 'trends'.

    Positive psychology isn't a trend type of thing. It's unfortunately being co-opted by the money making 'woo' ministers (typically those promoted by Oprah). You'll hear a lot of them use words from the theory and promote it as their own or say something like 'the science of positive psychology says..." So it's good to be careful who you hear things from. Positive psychology is a science and like all science it's constantly being looked at, challenged and new ideas are emerging.

    In life sometimes little things can mean a lot. I believe in keeping things simple.
    Truth, I can only agree with you on these points. I'm not too familiar with positive psychology until you mentioned it but I will take your word for it on that.
    Laura Knotek likes this.
    07-23-2019 12:23 PM
  22. libra89's Avatar
    This article kinda reminds me of one that MIA posted a few weeks ago. It's basically stating that workplace romances are becoming less common, and that dating apps are the most common way now. People still meet through friends but that has gone down as well.

    https://news.yahoo.com/workplace-rom...122240520.html
    Laura Knotek likes this.
    07-23-2019 12:28 PM
  23. MSFTisMIA's Avatar
    It's funny. A lot of the media in the UK are saying how short lived Boris will be as PM. They're talking a few of months.

    Not sure about that...

    It's a big 'depends on' thing. Truth is his party being the mess it is will be his downfall rather than the public likability.

    If Brexit doesn't happen (one way or the other) by Oct 31st the Tory party as it is will be decimated in any type of election which will likely come about because of that.

    It really is down to the next three months for Boris in that way. I guess most can't see him doing what needs to be done which is why they have that timeline.

    Interesting times...
    Thought I posted something on this earlier.

    People put too much faith in heads of state in the form of presidents and prime ministers having enough sway to get things done. Unless it is an authoritarian state disguised with democratic trappings, it's the parties themselves that decides what gets done or not.

    Good luck, Boris. Even though luck isn't what you need over the next few months.
    N_LaRUE and Laura Knotek like this.
    07-23-2019 05:09 PM
  24. MSFTisMIA's Avatar
    Went through Andrew in my late 20s. I’m so done with hurricanes and thunderstorms. Funny thing is, I can deal with the storms since they last a few hours. It’s the weeks without power in this absurd heat that I can’t handle anymore.
    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hurricane_Gilbert

    This was the monster that tore the roof off my childhood home. I still remember being in my brother's bedroom taping up windows as a yuge gust swept in, ripping the roof (including inside ceiling) off upwards and swinging it to the right (we never found where it landed).

    And we got it easy. So destructive it screwed over Mexico twice. At least I got this song out of it:

    N_LaRUE and Laura Knotek like this.
    07-23-2019 05:29 PM
  25. MSFTisMIA's Avatar
    Went through Andrew in my late 20s. I’m so done with hurricanes and thunderstorms. Funny thing is, I can deal with the storms since they last a few hours. It’s the weeks without power in this absurd heat that I can’t handle anymore.
    I guess my tolerance is high. I was so used to power outages as a child, it doesn't phase me either.

    Guess the expectation that I'm in Murica so it should run better as I'm paying for it. So when things break down, I just use my old school navigation skills.
    N_LaRUE, Laura Knotek and libra89 like this.
    07-23-2019 05:35 PM
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