Re: WC 150K Post Challenge - You Ready?!
A friend and his GF who has already been through grad school a while ago both told me that it's great to have a partner while in grad school. They actually also agreed at that so instantly, which has me wondering if this is actually true.
Just to note: They didn't know of each other at that time in their lives.
Um...yes and no.
I dated someone while she was in grad school and we broke up a few weeks after she graduated. Also, I've dated the current GF through my own grad school journey.
Like anything else, there are pros and cons. In the first scenario, we used to have long conversations about her studies - her master's was in divinity, so I was getting some free vicarious education on how the church works. Very, very enlightening. Our relationship was a big reason she never gave me much credit for that allowed her to get her degree and chart her professional course - she too is now a librarian having gotten a second master's after we broke up. With current GF, I didn't involve her as much in my school studies - she read a few papers and we talked about a few things, yet she saw the grind first hand.
I suspect that the sentiment your friends are tapping into is that having a partner present offers a great deal of emotional support. Grad school is a very specialized and socially restrictive (sometimes isolating) experience.
You can only get so much mileage out of doing it on your own without many supportive interactions and appropriate coping mechanisms. Some people use sex as an outlet, some people do other things to seek and receive that emotional support. I remember long conversations with a single mom colleague of mine after class was helpful to use both as we encouraged each other. I saw her hover a few times over the cracking point due to the stress and because we had developed that routine, she allowed me to her in her face with positive encouragement to pull it together.
One of the points off grad school is how do you practice self care, which includes maintaining and developing healthy relationships while under such strenuous circumstances. It is up to you to look at how you current construct those relationships and to make positive modifications as needed.
Grad school isn't for everyone, and what I dislike the most is in 'murica how people are pushed to grad school to even have a shot to stay afloat in the middle class and not completely drown in the working class. When people crash and burn, it's devastating. But when you get through it successfully, as I figure you will, it gives you a needed toughness to operate in those higher level situations that demand you be paid appropriately for your skill set.
Hope you find something useful in this soliloquy.