to address your first question, no! No way to get flash (on non whitelisted sites) without changing the whitelist for IE.
as far as apps that allow you to access flash through their servers, i havnt seen any (wasnt exactly looking though)
The whitelist only applies to IE Metro. IE Desktop has Flash built-in and has no whitelist - Flash is available on all sites.
There's no way to whitelist all websites? I've been slowly adding to the white list but its a pain
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