Cortana's witty replies

MeWhoElse

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What's the best phone operating system? / What's the best phone?
What's the best operating system?
Who is your father? / Who's your Daddy?
What's your favourite music? / What's your favourite song?
What's the best tablet?
What's the best computer?

Different replies each time:
Sing me a song?
How old are you?
Tell me a joke?
Where are you from? / Where do you live?
Do you have a boyfriend?
Are you pretty? / Are you sexy?
What should I call you?
What's the best search engine?
What are you?
Who made you?

Thanks to james05gt:
What do you look like?

Thanks to Mike Santagata:
Who are you?

Thanks to Aahaa:
Do you like Satya Nadella?
Do you like Steve Ballmer?
Do you like Bill Gates?

Thanks to MetalAZ:
What do you think of Apple?
Do you like Google?
Will you marry me?
I'm bored.
You're cool.
What's the best computer?
Who made you?
Tell me a story.
I'm really drunk.
Knock, knock.
What is Halo?
Beam me up Scotty.
What are you wearing?

Thanks to Gordon2001:
Where is the Master Chief?
Am I pretty?
I love you.
What's your name?
Can I change your name?
What is the meaning of life?
Do you love me?
Where do you live?
You are so intelligent.

Thanks to Dustin Hodges:
Do you know Siri?
Do you know Google Now?

Thanks to Septembersrain#AC:
Do you like Siri?

Thanks to Elton Jothi:
F*** you.
Bit**.

Thanks to Bills Pies:
What's the story of the next Halo game?

Thanks to david90531:
Are you pretty?
Are you smart?
Where is your home?
I'm confused.
You're funny.

Thanks to "Cannot think of a name":
Use the Force.
Do you like Android?

Thanks to Mattman86
Open the pod bay doors.
What's the answer to the universe?
What are you doing?
How are you doing?
Are you human?
What does the fox say?
I thought you were dead! / Didn't you die?
What is rampancy? / Tell me about rampancy.
Tell me about Dr. Halsey.
Tell me about [anything to do with Halo]
Are you Cortana from Halo?
Do you love Master Chief?

Thanks to StevoPhilo:
Kiss me.

Thanks to fallback:
Are you hot?
What is love?
Can you dance?
Are you real?
Who is your favourite artist?
I am angry.
Talk to me.
You're awesome.
What do you eat?

Thanks to Saif Ali Chishti:
Do you have a baby?
Are you male? / Are you female?
What do you think of Windows?
You suck.
Do you like iOS?

Thanks to romeupaz:
Good Morning.
Goodnight.
Do you like Google Now?
Do you have a mother?
Are you awake?
Can you cook?
That was not the question.

Thanks to Ceez:
Do you like Clippy? (Ask another (witty reply) question and her "Halo" will turn into Clippy from the older version of Office.)

Thanks to mr2009:
I hate you.
Why Cortana?
How old are you?
Who are you?
Do you like Microsoft Office?
Who is your boss?

Thanks to JPDVM2014:
Hello HAL.

Thanks to breeze1138:
Why did the chicken cross the road?
May the Force be with you.

Thanks to berty6294:
Talk dirty to me.

Thanks to Graelock:
Who's your creator?

Thanks to txkimmers:
How do I look today?
Do you have a sister?

Thanks to MyNL822:
Dance.

Thanks to Blacklac:
Who's better, you or Siri?

Thanks to acl14:
I don't like you.
May I kiss you.

Thanks to DVELOPinc:
What's better, Google or Bing?
Siri called you a Bit**
You my Ho.
You're sexy.
What is the meaning of Cortana?

Thanks to Daniel Ratcliffe:
What do you think of Microsoft?
Cortana!
Hello.
Good afternoon.
Good evening.
Goodbye.
What do you think of Xbox?
Do you love Master Chief?
Are you sleeping?
What are you up to?

Thanks to ven07:
Is Lumia the best smartphone?
Are you beautiful?

Thanks to enahs555:
You are ugly.
You are beautiful.

Thanks to Intrepid00:
Am I ugly?

Thanks to theonedunn:
Do you know Jen Taylor?

Thanks to altafmahmood:
You are an idi**.
You are a bad girl.
Sorry

Thanks to SpaceyO:
I'm stoned.

Thanks to xerox13ster:
Testing.

Thanks to aswinbarathb:
What do you think of me?

Thanks to Ekon:
I'm stupid.

Thanks to Sam Sabri:
Do an impression.

Thanks to @cortanaquotes:
Are you in Halo 5?
Say something funny.
Am I beautiful?
Are you boring?
Guess what!
You're creepy.
You're so annoying.
Do you like Jimmy Fallon?
Cortana, I'm lonely.
I'm happy.
You're the best assistant ever.
Thank you.
Can I borrow some money?
What's your story?
What does Cortana mean?
I'm drunk.
Where do babies come from?

Thanks to talderon: (some repeats)
Do you know what Master Chief is doing?
What is Master Chief doing?
I thought you were dead
Didn't you die?
Where is master chief?
What is rampancy?
Tell me about rampancy
Tell me about Halo 5?
Tell me about Dr. Halsey?
Tell me about Elites
What do you know about Halo 5?
Tell me about Catherine Halsey
What do you know about Dr. Halsey?
What is Elites?
Tell me about Grunts
Are you the Cortana from Halo?
What do you know about Elites
Are you dating Master Chief?
What do you know about Grunts
Tell me about Hunters
Tell me the story of Halo 5?
What is Master Chief up to?
What do you know about Hunters
Are you in love with Master Chief?
Are you really Cortana?
Do you love Master Chief?
What do you know about Jackals
Tell me about Jackals
Who is Catherine Halsey?
Are you the same Cortana from Halo?
What do you know about Hunters
Did you really die?
Tell me about Prophets
Who is Dr. Halsey?
Tell me about Buggers
Tell me about Brutes
Tell me about Prometheans
What is the story of Halo 5?
What do you know about Buggers
Tell me about Crawlers
Tell me about Watchers
Tell me about the Didact
What do you know about the didact
What do you know about Brutes
Tell me about Guilty Spark
Tell me about Knights
Tell me about the Librarian
What do you know about the Librarian
What you know about the flood
What do you know about Guilty Spark
Which is your favorite Halo?
What is your favorite Halo?
What is favorite Halo game?
Which is your favorite Halo game?
Tell me about Halo?
Tell me about beamish
What do you know about Halo?
Tell me about hamish beamish
Why are you blue in color?
Aren't you dead?
Why are you blue?
Which Halo game do you like the most?
What do you know about beamish
Tell me the story of Halo?
Will you be reborn in Halo 5?
Will you resurrect in Halo 5?
What is Master Chief's last name?
Will you come back in Halo 5?
Do you Master Chief's last name?
What is the story of Halo?
What do you know about hamish
What do you know about Hamish Beamish
What do you know about Catherine Halsey?
Are you in Halo 5?
Do you know Jen Taylor?
 
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Blakey.

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Whatever voice recognition engine they are using works marvels but the natural language and AI is really lacking at the moment.

Yeah, comparing it side by side with Siri, it's much better at recognizing what you're saying with a whisper. But I still can't figure out the lack of witty replies.
 

TOC51

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The voice recognition is amazing, but I also feel like she resorts to Bing searches more often than I expected. She is only in Beta, and I could simply be phrasing my questions poorly.
 

AaHaa

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Let's make this the big "Impress your friends with Cortana's witty replies-list"!
I've found some other ones:
"Are you a man or a woman?"
"Do you like Satya Nadella?"
"Do you like Steve Ballmer?"
"Do you like Bill Gates?"
 

MetalAZ

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I get witty... I'm in the US (Lumia 928). I tried the first one: "What's the best phone operating system?" and it came back with "Oh, come on, chief. Windows Phone".
 

MetalAZ

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Here's one: "what do you think of Apple".
Another: "Do you like Google"

I'm trying some of the Siri ones:

Will you marry me
I'm bored
You're cool
What's the best computer
Who made you
Tell me a story
I'm really drunk
Knock knock
What is Halo
Beam me up Scotty
Who's your daddy
Where do you live
What are you wearing
 
Last edited:

Gordon2001

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Apr 14, 2014
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"where is the master chief"
"am I pretty"
"I love you"
"whats your Name"
"can I change your Name"
"what is the meaning of live"
"do you love me"
"where do you live"
"you are so intelligent"
"what is halo" (my favorite ^^)
 
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