Nick,
seems this is happening everywhere. The 1020 was officially released in Italy on the 10th, yet blogs seems to show that no shop really have them and online retailers are the only way to go for now there. In France, the device will only be available starting 2nd of october but god knows what the available stock will be.
If the 920 launch (in France) is of any indication: from official release, it was only available through one chain (the phone house) for the first month, and most shops only had a couple of them. I gave up on the idea of getting one after two month... Really hope the 1020 launch won't be anything like that, but by the look of it it will probably be

And you're very right, the wholesituation is even more pathetic when compared to what apple or samsung are able to do.
Here's hopping that M$ will change things now they've bought Nokia and manage proper worldwide launch of futre lumia devices.