WC 1M Post Challenge - You Ready?!

[libra89]

Much of this is socialization. Instead of doing things are different but equal, we're still hung up on the difference.

This is true. It feels hard to go against the grain, but I do wish that more people would consider doing it sometimes. I know that a good amount of people are very looks driven when it comes to partnership, which is okay to care about, as long as it isn't number 1. I just wonder if it's really worth it to where that can take you.

This might be adjacent but you saying this made think of a couple I follow on YouTube. I think I came across them because they made a video on why they chose not to get married years ago. That shocked me but their reasoning was that they did the math financially and it was not beneficial for them as high earners as they would have to pay more in taxes. They bought a home together with them and they wear rings to make it easier for them with people socially. I think of them as people going against the grain for this reason and more.

This is already a long comment, but I believe they have been together for 6 years now. She became a mom at 17 and she recently shared that she was so nervous about being accepted by her partner's mom because of that, even though she has a very successful story (she became a lawyer). Her guy/partner didn't have any kids so he made the choice to take her and her kid, and they now have a child together.

 

[N_LaRUE]

That's why people like me will remain employed. Viciously underpaid, but employed nonetheless.

Engineering has never been great at diversity with men and women but it has been good with diversity in general.

My current work has the largest amount of women engineers I've had in one department. Out of the 30 there are 6 women. Not great but better than other places I've been.

As for pay, I can't say with any certainty about equality. The only thing I know is that staff gets paid less than contractors but have a lot of benefits here in France.

Your particularly industry has never been paid well which is to put it bluntly a crying shame.

 

[N_LaRUE]

This is true. It feels hard to go against the grain, but I do wish that more people would consider doing it sometimes. I know that a good amount of people are very looks driven when it comes to partnership, which is okay to care about, as long as it isn't number 1. I just wonder if it's really worth it to where that can take you.

This might be adjacent but you saying this made think of a couple I follow on YouTube. I think I came across them because they made a video on why they chose not to get married years ago. That shocked me but their reasoning was that they did the math financially and it was not beneficial for them as high earners as they would have to pay more in taxes. They bought a home together with them and they wear rings to make it easier for them with people socially. I think of them as people going against the grain for this reason and more.

This is already a long comment, but I believe they have been together for 6 years now. She became a mom at 17 and she recently shared that she was so nervous about being accepted by her partner's mom because of that, even though she has a very successful story. Her guy/partner didn't have any kids so he made the choice to take her and her kid, and they now have a child together.

Is getting married still a big deal in the US? Seems odd that's considered 'against the grain'....

I must have lived in the EU too long I think... no one cares here. Hell in Spain (and some other countries) it's uncommon for women to take their husbands last name.

There's that taxes thing again... hmmmm Here in France it wouldn't matter. You're together so your household income is considered joined regardless.

The 'grain' issue is the simple fact that society and culture dictate how you should be and how you should act. Those who are different are typically considered 'outcasts'.

My wife and I are 'different'. No children. Don't really drink. It can be difficult to socialize in general because of these differences and we don't make a fuss about it but people 'feel uncomfortable' about it more than we do. There in is the issue.

 

[libra89]

Is getting married still a big deal in the US? Seems odd that's considered 'against the grain'....

I must have lived in the EU too long I think... no one cares here. Hell in Spain (and some other countries) it's uncommon for women to take their husbands last name.

There's that taxes thing again... hmmmm Here in France it wouldn't matter. You're together so your household income is considered joined regardless.

The 'grain' issue is the simple fact that society and culture dictate how you should be and how you should act. Those who are different are typically considered 'outcasts'.

My wife and I are 'different'. No children. Don't really drink. It can be difficult to socialize in general because of these differences and we don't make a fuss about it but people 'feel uncomfortable' about it more than we do. There in is the issue.

Yeah, it still is, even though the level of importance depends on the community and where you are. I forgot to say that she also changed her last name to his to make it easier. The fact that they bought homes together while not married, even though they have a child together is different. In some cases, like immigration and certain things, it is easier to be married.

As for your point about taxes, there's an assumption that getting married is more beneficial on the tax side in the US. That's interesting that it is different in France. It makes me wonder how that works with roommates who just live together.

I agree with you on your point about the grain. Yeah y'all are really different, but I think it's great that y'all choose not to cave.

 

[MSFTisMIA]

Engineering has never been great at diversity with men and women but it has been good with diversity in general.

My current work has the largest amount of women engineers I've had in one department. Out of the 30 there are 6 women. Not great but better than other places I've been.

As for pay, I can't say with any certainty about equality. The only thing I know is that staff gets paid less than contractors but have a lot of benefits here in France.

Your particularly industry has never been paid well which is to put it bluntly a crying shame.

People don't care about my industry unless you're a doctor (PhD or MD for Psych). It's why some of those who are LCSWs or LMFTs act with their nose in the air vs those who aren't directly therapeutic/clinical work. I know you know what I mean by association. It annoys me to know end with that in the hospital setting especially.

I know, my grievance list is as long as the list of alternative facts as Fred C. Trump's son has been telling his whole life.

 

[MSFTisMIA]

This is true. It feels hard to go against the grain, but I do wish that more people would consider doing it sometimes. I know that a good amount of people are very looks driven when it comes to partnership, which is okay to care about, as long as it isn't number 1. I just wonder if it's really worth it to where that can take you.

This might be adjacent but you saying this made think of a couple I follow on YouTube. I think I came across them because they made a video on why they chose not to get married years ago. That shocked me but their reasoning was that they did the math financially and it was not beneficial for them as high earners as they would have to pay more in taxes. They bought a home together with them and they wear rings to make it easier for them with people socially. I think of them as people going against the grain for this reason and more.

This is already a long comment, but I believe they have been together for 6 years now. She became a mom at 17 and she recently shared that she was so nervous about being accepted by her partner's mom because of that, even though she has a very successful story (she became a lawyer). Her guy/partner didn't have any kids so he made the choice to take her and her kid, and they now have a child together.

Marriage, especially in 'Murica is more about the legal, social and financial benefits. It's why some those who are privileged will go into social contracts knowing that if a divorce happens, they will have access to some of the shared wealth that was acquired during the marriage.

It's why you see the twisted few who will kill a spouse rather than pay the social obligations of a divorce such as alimony, child support or splitting up assets.

I'll let the married regulars talk more about the love and that stuffs.

 

[MSFTisMIA]

So I'm in the laundromat doing a quick wash and one of the morning shows have a couple on who have been dating for 7 months who are debating about introducing the other to the respective families.

I remember when I went by my last significant ex's family for Thanksgiving the first time. Her godmother pulled me to the side and this was the conversation:

Godmother: Are you employed?
MIA: Yes
Godmother: What kind of job?
MIA: explained job and name dropped the hospital.
Godmother: Good. It sounds stable. Stay employed. I have one rule (points to my ex)
MIA: What's that?
Godmother: You can argue all you want, but don't get physical. If you do, I'll **** up THAT person.
Mia (laughs): Fine by me.

Needless to say, godmother (and her husband too, I still remember their names) very well. When Superstorm Sandy hit (well after we broke up), I got a random phone call.

Ex Godmother: This is Mrs. K. calling. How are you?
MIA: I am well. Safe from the storm and well. How are you and Mr. K.?
Ex Godmother: We are well also. I know that's you and my goddaughter's business, but we liked you and had no beef with you. I was upset when I heard. They never told me right away.
MIA: I appreciate your frankness. I really liked you both as well.
Ex Godmother: Well, we wanted to call and check in on you. Take care.
MIA: Thanks again for calling, I appreciate you thinking of me. Take care as well.

I share this just to say, if you handle your business and don't put extra pressure on yourself with that this holiday season, things will work out as they should. As long as you have a healthy relationship with your partner, in laws don't have to like you, but they will respect you - even if it's begrudgingly.

 

[MSFTisMIA]

Good luck with the shopping and cooking, and enjoy your dinner.

Thanks. I modified the menu, swapping out the meatloaf for salmon and steak. Turkey is some of the most fickle meat around. Ironically, the gf makes a good bird but has never made me one. Every time she wants to make me one I say no because I'll be stuck eating that for a week. Maybe next year I'll give in. Lol.

 

[libra89]

So I'm in the laundromat doing a quick wash and one of the morning shows have a couple on who have been dating for 7 months who are debating about introducing the other to the respective families.

I remember when I went by my last significant ex's family for Thanksgiving the first time. Her godmother pulled me to the side and this was the conversation:

Godmother: Are you employed?
MIA: Yes
Godmother: What kind of job?
MIA: explained job and name dropped the hospital.
Godmother: Good. It sounds stable. Stay employed. I have one rule (points to my ex)
MIA: What's that?
Godmother: You can argue all you want, but don't get physical. If you do, I'll **** up THAT person.
Mia (laughs): Fine by me.

Needless to say, godmother (and her husband too, I still remember their names) very well. When Superstorm Sandy hit (well after we broke up), I got a random phone call.

Ex Godmother: This is Mrs. K. calling. How are you?
MIA: I am well. Safe from the storm and well. How are you and Mr. K.?
Ex Godmother: We are well also. I know that's you and my goddaughter's business, but we liked you and had no beef with you. I was upset when I heard. They never told me right away.
MIA: I appreciate your frankness. I really liked you both as well.
Ex Godmother: Well, we wanted to call and check in on you. Take care.
MIA: Thanks again for calling, I appreciate you thinking of me. Take care as well.

I share this just to say, if you handle your business and don't put extra pressure on yourself with that this holiday season, things will work out as they should. As long as you have a healthy relationship with your partner, in laws don't have to like you, but they will respect you - even if it's begrudgingly.

It sounds like you left great impressions on her and her husband. That's so kind of them to check on you.

Thank you for the wisdom, I'll keep it in mind when it applies to me.

 

[libra89]

Wow. When you start something in hopes that you'll encounter a certain someone and you don't for a while so you decide not to care. Then when the encounter actually happens, I have a mix of feelings...

 

[MSFTisMIA]

It was a good day off. Still needed another.

 

[MSFTisMIA]

It sounds like you left great impressions on her and her husband. That's so kind of them to check on you.

Thank you for the wisdom, I'll keep it in mind when it applies to me.

There's so much pressure that gets applied in those situations - mostly unnecessary pressure. So as long as you handle yourself accordingly, that pressure matters a whole lot less - that's the ultimate point.

 

[libra89]

Wow. When you start something in hopes that you'll encounter a certain someone and you don't for a while so you decide not to care. Then when the encounter actually happens, I have a mix of feelings...

I did a thing related to this and the wait is on.

Edit: That's such a wrap it's funny. At least this is done lol

 

[MSFTisMIA]

I'm indifferent about Black Friday this year.

 

[N_LaRUE]

I'm indifferent about Black Friday this year.

I'm pretty sure I never bought anything on Black Friday.

I did buy something on the old Boxing Day sales back in the day but I basically stay away from all that stuff in general.

The stuff I currently need to buy has little to do with consumer goods.

 

[N_LaRUE]

So I'm at work and I'm going to leave at 1:30 today to go to my interview which is at 3:30 on the other side of Paris. It's closer to Paris than what I am now. I can't say with any certainty that I'll be taking this new position.

I'm really tired because I haven't slept well with all the nonsense that's going on. Our landlords are being jerks and I'm ready for a fight (figuratively speaking) if I have to. They will lose but it may take time to sort it and I don't really want the expense. But I will if I have to.

Along with that the stupid agency we dealt with about a house we were interested in has asked again for the same documents FOUR times! This is just insane. I really don't want to deal with these people but if there's still a possibility of getting this place (if I stay in my current position) then it's good to keep this option open.

 

[MSFTisMIA]

To all the US people: Happy Thanksgiving.
To Rue: Handle your business in the interview.
To everyone else: Enjoy your Thursday.

 

[MSFTisMIA]

I don't regret any of the LGs I've used over the past year. I always wanted the V30 but the display kept me away. If I had to do it over, I'd have just gotten a Korean V50 only, then a G8 second.

It's the same old two step with LG. Their handsets are very good. But they're perceived to be weaker vs others at the price point they start out at and crush some of the premium mid rangers when they fall in price. I've seen the new UX, which looks to be a bit of an improvement.

They'll need a newer design though (this current one started with the G6), and some other updates next year. If it were up to me, I'd focus on the camera and design for LG...and make the update situation better by providing bi monthly security patch releases. I don't mind the G series being the safer phone and the V series being the bigger screen with one wacky feature.

I think the ToF sensor in the G8 was a great start. I almost wished that they would make the V series phones a bit bigger an put two ToF sensors at the bottom of the display and drop the UDFS to go in with face/palm/fingerprint by air and use palm recognition/fingerprint mapping for unlocking. Study how people's hand motions are toward reaching for their devices and doing that vs forcing people to use certain gestures. I'd love them to offer secure face unlock, secure hand unlock and secure fingerprint unlock without touching the screen. And to make it more secure to study how people are naturally unlocking phones vs when someone is coercing you (blood pressure levels maybe?)

I'd do that. And keep the audio. And continue to improve on the camera. That's the kind of different I'd want from LG.

 

[MSFTisMIA]

Thanks. I modified the menu, swapping out the meatloaf for salmon and steak. Turkey is some of the most fickle meat around. Ironically, the gf makes a good bird but has never made me one. Every time she wants to make me one I say no because I'll be stuck eating that for a week. Maybe next year I'll give in. Lol.

So the menu was:

- Roasted red skin potatoes
- Roasted sweet potatoes
- Roasted Asparagus
- Grilled top Sirloin
- Baked Salmon fillets with a garlic + cilantro + fennel seed pesto
- Baked macaroni pie
- Sautéed mushrooms and leeks
- Stewed lentils

She did the pie and the lentils; I made everything else. Most tiring part was the dishwashing, really as a lot of pots and pans got recycled for multiple dishes. It was enough food to get through the next few days. Yup, carb heavy, but that's OK.

 

[MSFTisMIA]

So I'm at work and I'm going to leave at 1:30 today to go to my interview which is at 3:30 on the other side of Paris. It's closer to Paris than what I am now. I can't say with any certainty that I'll be taking this new position.

I'm really tired because I haven't slept well with all the nonsense that's going on. Our landlords are being jerks and I'm ready for a fight (figuratively speaking) if I have to. They will lose but it may take time to sort it and I don't really want the expense. But I will if I have to.

Along with that the stupid agency we dealt with about a house we were interested in has asked again for the same documents FOUR times! This is just insane. I really don't want to deal with these people but if there's still a possibility of getting this place (if I stay in my current position) then it's good to keep this option open.

Well, I hope everything pulls together for you in the best way possible. Sometimes the can be enough to make you .